The Van Leeuwens: November 2014

Alright, now to the unhappy portion of the birth story. It has a happy ending, which is good, but it was pretty scary at the time.

Lydia had spit up a few times during the day and when the pediatrician came to check her in the afternoon, he said she had swallowed amniotic fluid and that spitting up was normal. He also said that we shouldn't worry if she didn't breathe for a few seconds after spitting up since it was a reflex that would keep her from choking. We noticed that she did, in fact, hold her breath for a few seconds after spitting up until her airway was clear, so we didn't worry about it. Around 8 that night, Bryant was holding her while I went to use the bathroom. She spit up while I was in there and I was washing my hands when Bryant suddenly said she still wasn't breathing. I came out and he was holding her on her side and patting her back, but she had her mouth closed and was turning red. I grabbed the aspirator, opened her mouth, and tried to suction out the back of her throat, but she started turning purple. I pushed the nurse button and said something eloquent like, "Uhmm...my baby's not breathing!" A nurse came running in about 2 seconds later, grabbed Lydia out of my arms and ran, without saying a word to either of us.

We both started crying and hugging each other and Bryant kept saying, "I couldn't help her. She wasn't breathing and there was nothing I could do. She's my little girl and I couldn't help her!" Lots of crying happened. Two nurses came into our room about 5 minutes later and informed us that she was breathing again, but that it had taken their team three minutes with her on oxygen before she pinked up. Because of that, they were going to move her to the NICU and they wanted to know if we wanted to come see her. I want to know if any parent has ever said no to that request, because I can't imagine anyone NOT wanting to see their baby after something like that. We went in to see her and she was laying in one of those little beds in just her diaper and she was breathing pretty hard--you could see the muscles between her ribs straining with every breath. We talked to her and touched her and cried a little bit. The team of NICU nurses and the respiratory therapist were fantastic. They talked with us about her condition and told us they had ordered a chest x-ray to see if she had aspirated. My parents showed up and my dad helped Bryant give her a blessing, during which Bryant and I cried yet again. They did the chest x-ray (the tech who did the x-ray was my sister's old childhood friend, Jenny, which was pretty crazy!) and it looked clean so they decided not to take her to the NICU, but they wanted to keep her in the TLC lab overnight. The TLC lab is the step-down NICU, for babies who need some extra help/monitoring, but not enough to warrant going to the NICU. I fed her there in the TLC lab, then Bryant and I headed back to our room.

Bryant was still really struggling and blaming himself for what happened to our little lady. He had told my parents that Lydia was not breathing for at least a minute before the nurse came for her. I kept saying it had only been about 20 seconds (he agreed with me later, when he had calmed down a bit), and telling him it wasn't his fault, but he still had a pretty rough night. At one point I pointed out that if he hadn't been there it would have been worse because I would have set Lydia down to use the bathroom and wouldn't have known she needed help, but that made him more upset. I went to the lab twice during the night to feed her and was told she spit up twice, once after we had originally left and then again after her first feeding, but had kept her next one down. They let us take her out of the lab at about noon, just in time for some of my siblings to come visit. We spent the day relaxing and enjoying our little girl (and maybe paying really close attention to her breathing). The respiratory therapist told us that she would be fine now and that she had just had a bronchospasm and none of the fluid had gotten in her lungs. He advised us to be diligent about burping her so that she would have a lower chance of spitting up. It seemed like the issue was that all the amniotic fluid in her stomach kept making her vomit after eating, but it was now all cleared out and we were told she would be fine.

The only picture we took with her that second day. Go Cougars! And also, doesn't Bryant look good? I may have looked like crap, but my husband was cute enough to make up for it.

That night we requested a monitor to be brought into our room so we could keep her with us but have the security of knowing she wouldn't stop breathing during the night. They brought it in around 10:30, just after I finished feeding her, hooked her up to the monitors, and put her in her crib. Her little bed was inclined so her head was elevated to lower the risk of her spitting up. After the nurses left, Bryant and I climbed in bed and I prepared to get a few hours' sleep. Then Bryant noticed that she was on her side and was afraid she was too far on her side and her arm wouldn't be getting the blood it needed, so he got up and rolled her over. Which, of course, woke her up and nothing would make her go back to sleep until I nursed her again. I did, and laid her down on her back in her crib and climbed back in bed. Then Bryant said, "Oh no, she slid down!" He got out of bed and moved her up, which woke her up yet again. I then sternly told him to put a pillow over his face and that he was no longer allowed to look at her or touch her because I wanted to actually SLEEP!! I may have been a little tired and cranky at that point. He followed my directions, promptly fell asleep, and I was up with Lydia for another hour and a half while she fussed. Once she finally settled down, I managed to sleep for about 45 minutes before the alarm on the monitor went off. Bryant and I both jumped up in a panic, but her stats were fine. The monitor was just running out of batteries. We called the nurses, and they took her to weigh her and get a new monitor so I got another hours' worth of sleep. When they brought her back I fed her again and she once again refused to sleep. Long story short, between the hours of 11 and 4 (with an extra hour thrown in for the daylight savings change) I slept for about 2 hours. The last straw was when I finally got her to sleep at 3:40 and the monitor started beeping again at 4 because, you guessed it, the battery was running low. When they came in to fix it I requested they take her to the nursery because I desperately needed a few hours of sleep. After they took her, however, I started crying because I felt like a terrible mother for sending her away. Luckily, Bryant was there to calm me down and I finally got a few hours of sleep before we were discharged Sunday morning.

Not the most flattering picture, but here we are leaving the hospital!

And here's my sweet little girl making a funny face to keep me entertained during the car ride.

She has been perfectly fine since that incident (although I might have a mini panic attack every time she coughs or chokes while eating or being burped), which we are thankful for every single day. I am also oh-so-thankful that I decided not to have her in Grenada. They don't have a NICU and I can't imagine what would have happened to her there. The lack of NICU was one of the biggest determining factors for me in coming back to the States, and although I would rather not have needed it, I'm so glad that I had those amazing people to help my little girl!!

This post is two weeks late, but I've been just the teensiest bit busy lately so I hope you'll forgive me. Our little Lydia arrived on Halloween, just as planned, and here's her birth story:

Bryant's flight was supposed to land at 9:30 pm on the 30th and my induction was scheduled for 11:00 that same night. Unfortunately, there was something wrong with the plane in Grenada and the delay meant he didn't land in Utah until 11. Luckily, the hospital told me it was just fine to show up whenever since they weren't busy, so my original plan of picking Bryant up and heading to the hospital remained intact. Picking him up was amazing and also a little weird since we hadn't seen each other in months. He's gotten so skinny!! He needs me there to make sure he's eating well.

Anyway, I picked him up, we stopped at my parents' house so he could take a quick shower and wash off all his airport/plane germs before holding his daughter, then it was up to the hospital. Can I just say, by the way, how weird it is to just drive up to the hospital to have a baby when you're not in labor? It seemed completely unreal. We got there around 12:45 in the morning on Halloween, they checked me (I was dilated to about 3 1/2 cm), and they started me on the Pitocin at about 1:30. Bryant and I were both pretty tired but very excited! They came back to check on me around 1:45 and I said I thought I had felt one contraction, so they upped the dose. I then proceeded to have a contraction about once every minute (Bryant was timing them) and they were KILLING me. The nurse came back at two and I told her the contractions were very close together and that I wanted an epidural. She turned down the Pitocin and I got the epidural at 2:15, Bryant watched and was full of amazement at the pushing that was involved in getting it in. I was just grateful that it worked! Around that time I noticed some hives on my arm. They went away in about half an hour, so I think they were stress related.

After the epidural, I felt nothing. And I mean nothing. It was glorious. I could still move my legs and everything, but I couldn't even tell when I was contracting anymore. At about 3 we requested to take a nap for a while and the nurses turned down the lights and left. Bryant fell asleep immediately, but I was kind of drifting in and out because the monitors on my belly kept slipping and the nurses had to come in to adjust them so they could watch Lydia's heartbeat. At 3:30 they came in to put a catheter in and I was dilated to an 8. The nurses were floored but said I could keep resting for a while. My mom had requested a phone call when I was getting close, so I asked if this qualified as close and they told me no, I would probably still have to labor down a lot.

We were left alone again for about 15-20 minutes when the baby's heartbeat disappeared again. The nurse came in to adjust the monitor and discovered that Lydia had moved down a lot. She checked me again and said I was dilated to a 10, complete, and the baby was moving down. She actually seemed pretty confused about what to do next since I hadn't been there that long. Eventually she said she wanted me to push with a contraction to see what would happen. Bryant called my mom while I did that (the nurse had to tell me when to push since I couldn't feel the contractions) and after he hung up the nurse had him come down to see the head while I pushed--apparently the pushing was helping things a lot! My waters were still intact, but Bryant could still see her head and informed me that she had hair. Hair! Bryant and I were both bald as babies, so that was a surprise.

My nurse left to call the doctor and when she got back she took out my catheter and had me push once or twice more. My doctor got there at around 4:20 and they got me ready for delivery. I pushed for maybe 15 minutes and Lydia was born at 4:56. I kept turning to Bryant and saying, "Are you sure you can see her head? I swear this shouldn't be so easy." It was painless, quick, and required very little effort on my part. My doctor told me I was made for having babies (tell that to my uterus which successfully repelled babies for 3 years) and to be careful about telling other people because they'd be jealous.

Little Lydia Belle came out perfect. Her head was still very round (thanks to the quick delivery) and she's just the cutest thing I've ever seen! Also, she cried very little and was very alert from the beginning. I know all these pictures show her sleeping, but she was awake a lot, too!

My parents got to the hospital just after she was born and visited for a while, then left us to take a nap. We enjoyed the day with Lydia and welcomed many visitors, including Bryant's parents and my older sister. She got dressed up in her Minnie Mouse Halloween costume as well.